Gerineldo and the Hairy Nalgas

One of my favorite classes in the Introduction to Literature (in Spanish) course is when we read the medieval ballad "Romance de la Melisenda." I then have the students listen to a certain Britney Spears recording to compare and contrast content and theme of popular music over some six centuries. This always fruitful class activity led to the conception of the poem below, in which the "lyrics" part of my poem mixes "Melisenda" with "Crazy" and medieval Spanish with modern American English. (Another popular ballad from the same time period was the "Romance de Gerineldo.")

Gerineldo and the Hairy Nalgas
never made it out of Juan’s garage.
Quique played the bass and Steve the drum set,
somebody sang while Juan played lead guitar.
They used to shake the house and rock the calle,
as they covered all the hits “back when,”
from Mecano up to Ozomatli,
Fabulosos Cadillacs también.
But their version of “You Drive Me Crazy”
was Juan’s creation and their biggest dream.
It was a sampler from the Romancero
that built a backstory for Britney Spears:
“El romance de la Melisenda”
about a princess who stayed up all night.
Juan got Melissa to perform the lyrics -
she was Steve’s girlfriend but Juan loved her right.

Baby, I’m so into you
Yo soy princesa, eres príncipe azul.
De mi cama salté,
Wearin’ nothin’ as if it were my birth day.
Every time you look at me
Los mis pechos laten, it’s easy to see.
You drive me crazy
No puedo dormir
Me dize mi abuela que
There’s nothing to fear.
Sooyy…loca, carpe diem’s right,
Baby, thinkin’ of you keeps me up all night.
Conde, you’re so into me
Yo soy la moça que te encanta a ti.
Dime, will you marry me?
Ya maté un hombre para llegar aquí.
Cada vez I look at you,
No sé qué hacer - ¿qué harías tú?
Me vuelves crazy
I just can’t sleep.
Me dizen mis doncellas que
I’m in too deep
Sooyy…loca, carpe diem’s right,
Baby, thinkin’ of you keeps me up all night.

Gerineldo and the Hairy Nalgas
never made it past the neighbor’s yard.
But Melissa learned that Juan was her man,
and soon “Just Married” was soaped on their car.
They had a son and named him Gerineldo,
not for them a name like “Luis” or “James.”
From the juglares to American Idol,
the more things change the more they stay the same.